Thursday, April 29, 2010

One step forward, two steps back


Part of my work involves helping people to change—to change themselves, their situation, or both. Some want to change their marriage, others their finances, some want to quit an addiction. They want to be a better person, to be able to enjoy their life more, or to successfully deal with a problem. We all need to learn how to do those things if we really want to succeed in life.

But I have observed one thing that defeats many people who are trying to change.

Setbacks.

The person comes to us with a problem; we listen, give him direction on what to do, and pray for him. The next thing you know is he comes back all happy and saying, “Pastor, it’s working like magic! My wife and I haven’t argued for week…” or “I closed a new contract today, it will really help me with those debts…” or “I haven’t felt like using drugs anymore.” And I am really happy to see his life changing.

But then, that same person might come back a few days later looking like they’ve just been in the ring with Mike Tyson. And I hear that the wife had him sleep in the couch the night before, or that his car broke down when he really didn’t need the extra expense, or that he took a puff at his friend’s pipe when he visited the other day.

Understand this: Changing your life is not like changing your shirt. Expect setbacks. You will make one step forward and two steps back for a while. It’s important you don’t beat yourself up over this.

What you need to do is pick yourself up, go back to where you left off, and start over. Change takes time. Change requires perseverance.

If you keep going, you will outlast the setbacks.

Renato Cardoso

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